Divine Interruptions-Scars & Identify
When the resurrected Jesus appeared before his disciples the book of John tells us that Thomas is not confident that Jesus is really raised. As the story goes, Jesus then appears to Thomas and asks him to touch the holes in his hands and side. For many reasons, this is a fascinating encounter. If one has the mistaken understanding that “resurrection” is just a way of talking about immortality of a body-less soul or some kind of magical way to fix all that is broken, this story shatters such an illusion. While the pain of the crucifixion is gone, Jesus still has scars from it. There is continuity between Jesus’ resurrection body and the body that goes into the tomb. It is transformed, but the same entity. Perhaps more interesting is that Jesus ultimately gives proof of his identity with his scars. “Aren’t sure it is really me? Check my wounds.”
There is a delicate balance for human beings to strike in how we identify ourselves by our wounds. On the one hand, those who follow Jesus believe in redemption. Every person is much more than the worst thing that has happened to them, or the worst thing they have done. On the other hand, our wounds do help to shape who we are. It is the survival of pain that often moulds us in one way or the other. Generally personality types (like the MBTI or similar instruments) do not change over time, unless a major trauma happens in someone’s life. We’ve all known someone who lost a spouse or child and was never quite the same. Those who lived through significant events know that the United States has never quite been the same post-COVID, or post-9/11, or post-Pearl Harbor. While our wounds are not the totality of our personhood, they do make a special part of our story. Thus, Jesus shows Thomas who he is by his wounds.
This week in our teaching time we talked with Preston Cottrell, one of our shepherds, about the loss of his parents. Preston’s mom and dad both passed pretty closely together when he was around 30. Losing your folks before you are comfortable in your own adulthood is a life shaping event. I’ve known Preston before that loss and I hadn’t considered the force of those events on his life until this lesson. In many ways Preston hasn’t changed from the young man I first met. But as I look at his leadership, it is obvious that there is a depth and empathy that he carries now that is hard won. These hard experiences have interrupted his life but also shaped his worldview. He is so much more than a man who lost his parents but you cannot talk about who he is, particularly spiritually, without acknowledging that experience either.
If I had to boil down what this teaches us, I think it is that Jesus offers a particularly helpful lens for our wounds because he is a healer. Jesus is defined by his wounds, but they are healed wounds. No longer did his hands or side bleed or ache. The evidence of past pain is there, but in a way that puts that pain in the rear view mirror. If we define by our wounds without healing them, that is dangerous. That becomes bitterness. The path of Jesus offers us neither the option to wallow in our losses nor to ignore their existence. It is a path of accepting, learning, appreciating, and then growing through and past those hard times. May God grant you the peace to cope with your wounds and find new life, scars and all.